Dating after coming out
Give us a little more credit than to assume we find straight men attractive only because they're men with penises. Life as they knew it, for themselves and those of significance in their life, just got dumped into the proverbial blender and it's spinning at high power.
Our attraction to straight men often comes from their masculinity, demeanor, social prowess, and fatherly/husbandly DNA. This doesn't mean they aren't capable of pursuing a serious dating or long-term relationship.
She was trying to appease her conservative republican parents and envision a future in which she wasn’t alone–because a lot of the time, being gay can be so lonely.
Coming out, we are afraid to show anyone ourselves for fear of losing our loved ones.
An estimated 3.5% of Americans (9 million of us) are LGBT, which is quite a lot of people if you think about it, but that statistic only gives part of the picture.
In the US, 30% of people under the age of 30 identify along the bisexual spectrum–that’s roughly 1 in 3 people!
Clearly, there are a lot more of us than film and television portray.
Of course good looks, a tricked out body and killer smile sure make the whole package more desirable. It simply means they've got a lot of irons in the emotional fire and you might accidently get burned.
The million dollar question that gets visited more often than one would think is, "Are newly out gay men, previously married or otherwise, good dating and mating prospects? On the other hand, because they've got emotions running high, you're going to see the raw truth of who they are, a bonus that often doesn't get seen until 1 to 6 months into most relationships.
Who would want to date (let alone be in a relationship with) a guy who first, couldn't figure out who he was for 38 years, second, was plowing through the emotional landmines of divorce, and third, was only available every couple of days and every other weekend (my custody schedule was insane at first).
I was at my wits end and came off as a depraved, needy little boy, standing in the corner, stomping his feet demanding that guys love him. )Yet, what I hadn't learned to do yet was love myself first.
Like any newbie out person—whether it's from divorce, job loss, health issues, etc.—anytime someone is newly out, or coming out of a life changing experience, it's important to check-in with your own personal values and determine how much of someone's personal journey you're ready to take on.