Dating other couples
Take a cue from Sarah, and ask yourself what you’re looking to get out of this experience.
Are you looking for a connection or just some no-strings-attached sex?
Even though this isn’t an experience that you have to run and tell all of your friends and family about and there’s nothing wrong with having secrets, you still need to figure out if you, personally, will feel any shame or guilt around it.
Sarah encourages prospective unicorns to tell a close friend whenever they’re going on any dates with couples.
Hopefully, you’ll have communicated enough prior to avoid that, but check in with each other periodically to make sure everyone is still on the same page.
Ask yourself, Regardless of how adventurous or open-minded you might feel about sex, feeling pressure from societal stigmas or traditional expectations can be a total buzzkill.
(Unless, of course, that’s the specific dynamic you want and even then, you have to make that clear too!
)Sure, it can be intimidating to share intimate information with people you’ve recently met.
Simple adjustments to my online dating profiles opened the gate for messages from couples—and a rush of options.Think you might be a good fit for a unicorn relationship?I found it helpful to ask myself these questions and answer them as honestly as I possibly could before I put myself out there: When Sarah, 40, a unicorn I spoke with on the phone, got divorced, she wasn’t immediately ready for more commitment.“I needed some time to work on myself,” she told me.For the unicorn, there are two people to impress, two people to be impressed by, and three sets of wants, needs, and desires that you have to contend with if you’re going to have an enjoyable, comfortable time.The couple I met for drinks was also new to three-person dating.
But your needs, your desires, and importantly, your boundaries have not yet been a part of that conversation, and it’s up to you to make them clear.